can I stop the time? I don't wanna get old. seriously. I'm turning 25 in 4 days. T__T that's a quarter century. next thing I know, I am already half century old. how time flies!
I don't know what's going to happen in the future. I don't care either. it's because what will be, will be. worrying about the future is totally estupido plus wasting my time. I'll never know what's gonna happen. so what's the point of worrying about the future? forget it then. so whatever plan I have now, I have to stick to it. whatever happens next, is beyond my control. and if the plan doesn't work out, it's probably not what Allah has planned for me. I've always been an optimist, not always, but most of the time. as I'm always practicing --> just go with the flow.
expect the unexpected. I'm always preparing myself for the worst. I've been trained for almost 25 years to handle all the heartbreaks, the lost of loved ones, backstabbed by good friends, surprisingly I have haters + bitches who are not happy that I am alive (what the eff is wrong with these people??), all the pains, sadness, loneliness, traumas. and I think I've experienced enough pain.
I'm tired of being an adult. tiredddd. so much to think about. it's not easy. I don't know about other people, but as for me, it's harder because I don't care about myself but my loved ones. I don't really care about what I want. what I care the most is what they want. how I wish I could be a kid again so that all I can do is play, play, and play.
It's kinda funny as I grow older, my memories of the past are disappearing bit by bit. there are so many things that I can't remember. but my best friend does. she's like my 'external hard drive'. I don't wanna keep those memories, so let her keep them. haha! sometimes she talks about my past, reminding me how unpleasant my past is. hideous. I hate you Nong! haha
I don't know what's going to happen in the future. I don't care either. it's because what will be, will be. worrying about the future is totally estupido plus wasting my time. I'll never know what's gonna happen. so what's the point of worrying about the future? forget it then. so whatever plan I have now, I have to stick to it. whatever happens next, is beyond my control. and if the plan doesn't work out, it's probably not what Allah has planned for me. I've always been an optimist, not always, but most of the time. as I'm always practicing --> just go with the flow.
expect the unexpected. I'm always preparing myself for the worst. I've been trained for almost 25 years to handle all the heartbreaks, the lost of loved ones, backstabbed by good friends, surprisingly I have haters + bitches who are not happy that I am alive (what the eff is wrong with these people??), all the pains, sadness, loneliness, traumas. and I think I've experienced enough pain.
I'm tired of being an adult. tiredddd. so much to think about. it's not easy. I don't know about other people, but as for me, it's harder because I don't care about myself but my loved ones. I don't really care about what I want. what I care the most is what they want. how I wish I could be a kid again so that all I can do is play, play, and play.
It's kinda funny as I grow older, my memories of the past are disappearing bit by bit. there are so many things that I can't remember. but my best friend does. she's like my 'external hard drive'. I don't wanna keep those memories, so let her keep them. haha! sometimes she talks about my past, reminding me how unpleasant my past is. hideous. I hate you Nong! haha
I am happy with my life now. happier. =) thank you Allah.
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